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  I set my cup down on the beautiful white countertop and approached him for a hug. I needed to feel the protection, the heat, the strength and confidence that he felt towards all that. My eyes blurred. I wanted to cry like a little girl who does not know, who doesn’t understand, who simply feels a sensation of inner drowning and wants it to go away.

  “Do you think I’ll come back?” I whispered, leaning on his shoulder, letting a tear fall on my cheek.

  “Of course you’ll come back,” he said, kissing my hair. His arms enveloped me even more firmly. “And I’ll be here waiting for you.”

  “I’m afraid,” I confessed. And then I allowed myself to open the floodgate of my emotions, letting the warm salty water from my eyes flood my skin.

  Chapter 26

  The Trip

  On the way to the hospital in the car, Ian, knowing my concern, affectionately encouraged me.

  “Your father already knows. In fact, I think he’s waiting for you to tell him.”

  “It’s a consolation.” I smiled a bit sarcastically.

  But, yes, not to take the news lightly, it was a relief after what had happened.

  Arriving at my father’s room, I found him alone. My aunt and uncle had just left for home after spending the whole afternoon with him.

  Ian kept himself busy parking. I knew he’d delay a few minutes to give me time to talk to my father, a gesture for which I was grateful.

  I entered, convinced. I’d get straight to the point. I didn’t want to delay it any more. Even though my father knew there was a high probability that I could leave, I had to tell him, ‘face him,’ and confirm that, in effect, I’d decided to go to the distant Gobi Desert in Mongolia.

  Yes, that bothered me. A part of me told me that his fear about me going on this trip could have been the final trigger for him to suffer the aneurysm that now had him hospitalized. I could have been the drop that overflowed his blood vessels and made him spew his pain, and his fear of loneliness. And I remembered what just a few seconds ago had occupied my mind as I walked down the hospital corridor. I took a deep breath and tried to forget the stormy though of guilt because, seeing what I’d seen, I knew that feeling didn’t do anyone any good.

  “I’m here,” I said in sing-song voice, entering his room.

  “Hello, daughter.”

  “Hi. How are you?” I asked while I leaned over to give him a kiss on the cheek.

  “Truthfully, very well,” he answered, smiling. That made me happy.

  “That’s great!” I thought I should seize the moment and settle the issue once and for all.

  “Dad.” I got his attention moving a chair and putting it next to the bed. I sat down slowly. “Ian has read me the message you got the other day.”

  I hadn’t planned to start out that way, but that was the first thing that came to mind. The way I expressed it, I realized, was the same as saying “I’m going to Gobi.”

  He looked at me expectantly. I, on the other hand, stayed quiet as I didn’t know how to continue. I was afraid I’d been very abrupt.

  “Oh, yes? It was to be expected,” he said thoughtfully, breaking the silence.

  “Do you mean you expected it?” I replied with some relief.

  “Daughter, I’m your father, I’ve known you for more than thirty years, of course I expected it,” he declared with a big smile of superiority. That face made me laugh. “When are you going?” he asked serenely.

  “I have to talk to Victor first, to make sure everything is still on track. But I don’t think we’re in a rush. We have to be there the 13th,” I explained, although I had the feeling he remembered that date.

  “And what do you think could be the objective of going to that place?”

  “I have a hard time imaging it,” I answered, looking at the spotless sheet that covered his chest. “And in a place so far away and hard to access...truthfully, I don’t know what part I can play in all this and...”

  “And what?”

  “And at the same time, I feel with all my heart that I must go. It’s like I’m going to meet someone I haven’t seen in a long time. It’s a very, very strange feeling.”

  “I also feel deep in my heart that you should go. If they’ve called you, it’s for some reason, he said, his voice full of love and understanding. I felt that his words were also charged with melancholia, as if we were saying good-bye forever and he was forcing himself to not stop me. “According to the message, those beings are waiting for you all.”

  At that moment, I remembered the phone conversation we’d had before his aneurysm when I said in an ironic way that I wasn’t going to go with them. I remembered his answer, apparently joking: “Take us with you!”

  What if, after all, it wasn’t a joke? An incredulous grimace crossed my face, accompanied by a stifled sigh. Just then, Ian came in.

  “Hello, Joaquín, how are you?”

  “Hi, champ,” he answered enthusiastically, “here I am, getting as strong as a bull.”

  Even in his convalescence, he maintained an admirable positivity.

  “Have I interrupted something?” Ian asked after a long silence.

  “No, not at all! We were talking about Aurora’s trip to the Gobi Desert.”

  Ian gave me a satisfied smile, and for a second, I found myself submerged in his honeyed yet masculine ocher eyes.

  “Good,” exclaimed Joaquín, bringing us out of our distraction, “and when were you thinking of telling me about your advances?”

  Ian and I looked at each other in astonishment. “Is it a play on words, or is he really referring to our relationship?” I thought.

  “Our advances, Dad?” I repeated, frowning, while a laugh escaped my partner. Guided by the fleeting looks of mischief in my direction and Ian’s, I realized what he was referring to. I turned as red as a tomato.

  “Dad!” I exclaimed between my teeth, my eyes open wide. I couldn’t believe it, did this man not understand what discretion was?

  “It’s clear you’ve moved forward,” he insisted.

  Both of us stayed quiet, except that, while Ian couldn’t stop laughing, my face stayed on fire.

  “Well, Dad, it’s still to be talking about ‘advances’ so drop it, please.”

  “Okay, okay, I’ll drop it. But you both know I think you make a stupendous couple...”

  I narrowed my eyes and looked at him through my lashes.

  “Enough!” I ordered.

  “Okay, okay, I’ll shut up.”

  *･｡.·.｡･*

  Once I’d talked to Ian and my father, there was just one more thing: communicate to Victor that I accepted his offer to go with him to Gobi.

  When the three of us had been in the room for a little while talking and laughing, and enough time had gone by for my father had forgotten about gossiping about the ‘advances’ in my relationship with Ian, I decided to go out to the hallway to talk with my future travel companion.

  “I’m going to call Victor.”

  “Okay, let us know what he tells you,” asked my father.

  “Yes, I will.”

  And taking my phone that I’d had in my purse, I got up from my chair and left the room.

  Once in the corridor, I scrolled up and down my contact list. I couldn’t believe it! I was nervous and afraid again. Although I knew those emotions had nothing to do with any fear of facing any danger during the trip, something inside told me that this would be extremely important for me and I sensed that, following this, my life would change forever.

  The fear was actually dizziness. Dizziness from not knowing what I’d have to face, or who or what I might meet, of having such an intense experience that would radically and absolutely transform my way of seeing and perceiving the world.

  If I had a very deep experience, would I be able to handle it well? Or would it be more than I could handle? Would it leave me disturbed?

  Once again doubts filled my head. The only thing that consoled me was knowing that Victor would also be part of t
he expedition. At least I wouldn’t feel completely alone.

  I took in a deep breath through my nose and there, in the stairwell of the tenth floor, looking through the undulating and built-up landscape of Madrid, I pressed the call button.

  Victor answered at the other end within seconds.

  “I was thinking about you,” he blurted out happily.

  “Oh yeah?” I answered, remembering that he hadn’t been out of my mind since he’d come to my house to see me. Of course I didn’t say anything.

  “Yes, I already have your tickets. You’re coming, right?”

  “Yes, I’m going, but what if I had said no?”

  “I knew you’d come.”

  “Why?”

  “Because of the reaction you had and because something told me,” he said self-satisfied.

  Apparently, everyone had known from the beginning that I was going on this trip except me. I’d definitely been the last to know.

  “All right,” I answered resignedly. “We’ll have to talk so you can give me the details—when we’re leaving, what time the flight is, what I need to take—I don’t know, everything I need to know and prepare before we go.”

  “Sure, don’t worry. I was just now writing an email to give you all the instructions. That’s why I was thinking about you.”

  I don’t know why, but I could hardly answer.

  I just said, “Great.”

  “Okay, I’ll send it to you shortly. By the way, how’s your father doing? Is he recovering well?”

  “Yes, he’s much better. The doctors have said that today or tomorrow they’ll let him go home. Of course, he’ll have to rest and not do anything too tough or lift weight for a certain time, but he seems to be coming along fast.”

  “I’m really happy,” he sounded sincere.

  “Well, okay, you’ll send me the email then?” I said, wanting to end the conversation.

  “Yes. Between today and tomorrow you’ll have it. But so that you start getting used to the idea, we’re leaving in a week.”

  “A week?” I repeated, shocked.

  “Yes, of course. It’s already the fourth.”

  “Ah, that’s true. It’s amazing how the days go by.”

  “Yes, well—if you have questions tomorrow, we can talk.”

  It seemed like he, too, was in a hurry to finish.

  “Perfect, have a good rest.”

  “You, too. Tell your father hello.”

  “I’ll tell him.”

  Once I hung up, I sat down on the stairs with my head in my hands. My mind was shaken up.

  “In a week I’m going to Mongolia,” I reflected, “to do I don’t know what, with I don’t know who, for I don’t know how long...guided by a man who’s in touch with extraterrestrials...and at the same time, those beings are sending messages to my family to tell them they’re waiting for me...but what do I have to do with all this? It feels like it’s all a dream...”

  Sitting there, my gaze lost in the gray wall of the landing that held me, I felt my heart beating hard and rhythmically, but at the same time serene. That was some consolation after all. Breathing that tranquility before such an uncertain journey gave me a good feeling. On the other hand, nostalgia and happiness were becoming inseparable companions and at that very moment, they decided to take over my body. My eyes reacted to the abrupt attack of emotions and started tearing up without me being able to stop it. I felt my heart divided, as if I wanted to be faithful to two different worlds, unattainable, irreconcilable. Something had awakened and forebode not to be silenced again.

  Chapter 27

  Going Home

  It was still afternoon, but my eyelids were heavy. I needed to sleep, rest, disconnect my brain from that adventure for a few hours. A little after I talked to Victor, Ian decided to go home. Well, actually I encouraged him to go several times.

  My father had had dinner and I was getting ready to. I picked up the Tupperware and did the same. I didn’t want to go to the hospital restaurant because, apart from some pieces of fruit, the food was all fish, meat, by-products, white rice, refined pasta. I was somewhat demanding in my diet and life habits. My intuition told me that being a little bit careful with food kept me healthier, more lucid and in shape.

  “I’m sure they’ll release me tomorrow,” my father said while I ate.

  “Yes, it’s possible. You’re getting better fast,” I said with my mouth half full.

  I knew he hated seeing me sleep on the sofa bed. On several occasions he tried to convince me that he didn’t need me at night, but I felt like staying with him. When one is sick they feel like being with the people closest, and in his case, that was me.

  “I think I’m going to sleep, I’m so sleepy...you know what time of the morning the nurses start making a ruckus you can’t believe?” he asked rhetorically. “At seven!”

  I didn’t answer, I just listened to him, smiled, and kept chewing.

  “They come in to take your temperature like they’re partying and later they come back all polite and ask ‘How did you sleep?’ he said, imitating their voices.

  “And what do you say?”

  “That I hardly slept,” he replied, upset. “At midnight, they come waking you up to ask if you want juice or a glass of milk. Then they take their time bringing it to you. And finally, at almost one in the morning, they let you sleep. What are they thinking, waking up sick people at seven? We need to sleep and rest!” he claimed, raising his voice.

  “Okay, okay, don’t get mad,” I answered, laughing. “Go to sleep if you’re sleepy, and if they come in with the juice, tell them to leave it on the table and that you’ll drink it when you wake up.”

  “Okay,” he said, satisfied.

  He made a move to position himself.

  “You know what? I want to go home.”

  “I know, it will be soon.”

  “Okay, my daughter. I’m going to sleep. I hope you can rest on that uncomfortable sofa.”

  “Definitely, Dad. Besides, you get used to it.”

  “If you say so...”

  “Sleep well.”

  After a little while, I did the same. It was only ten-thirty at night, but I was done. I reclined the armchair, and before sleeping, asked the Universe that if the nurses dared to come into the room to offer anything, they’d leave it on the table without saying anything or bothering us. And that must have worked, because the next time I looked at the time on my phone, it was six in the morning. I slept like a rock, and didn’t hear a sound. Nothing. If my father had asked me for something during those hours, I wouldn’t have heard it, either. “What a help I was!” I thought, a little embarrassed. But I didn’t want to give it any more importance.

  I leaned over his bed to see if he was still asleep, and he seemed to be resting comfortably. Satisfied with that, I repositioned myself in my rigid bed to continue with mine.

  After a few seconds, the room started to light up. An intense brightness filtered through the slits of the blinds. I was surprised that a doctor in a white coat and mask would come into our room at that hour. I had never seen him before. He passed me without saying hello, and didn’t even look at me. He went straight to my father’s bed.

  I tried to focus my vision better so I could identify who it was, and I was surprised to see my mother resting on the mattress. Her legs were raised, open. Her gut was prominent. She seemed to be pregnant. No! She was about to give birth. A loud moan of pain confirmed my suspicion and at the same time, made me shudder. The doctor attended her on the other side of a sheet while I watched the scene. I didn’t know what I was doing there. No one seemed to see me. No one talked to me. Not even my father, who was on the other side of my mother, holding her hand, and who was looking in my direction. I felt like part of the audience in a theater performance, in a very real scene.

  Suddenly, the doctor took the baby from her belly and gave it to a nurse. She had an odd appearance, wearing a full body suit, silvery and somewhat shiny. The baby looked translucen
t. Although I didn’t see the sex, I knew it was female. Then the doctor got up, which allowed me to see his height, much taller than any of us. He could easily be ten feet tall. The doctor’s coat disappeared, giving way to clothing similar to the woman’s. In his case, it was a dark gray one piece suit, his hair somewhat long, smooth, caramel tone. His body was defined and slender at the same time, like the female. He approached what I had first thought was a nurse and touched the little girl on the forehead.

  “We will always be with you, supporting and guiding you,” said the giant ‘angel.’ I didn’t understand why they were speaking to the baby as if she could understand them.

  “We won’t leave you here, when the moment comes, we’ll take you back,” the woman said.

  The man, with the newborn in his arms, addressed my mother, and handed her the baby.

  “You will be in charge of Aumnox for thirty years. After that, you will have completed your assignment,” he told my mother.

  “And the girl?” she asked.

  “The moment you leave, she, who will be a woman by then, will start to remember everything, the work we’ve begun and the reason for her presence on this planet.”

  The nurse came in after giving two consecutive and hard knocks at the door.

  “Good morning!” she exclaimed in a sing-song tone, walking towards my father with a cart.

  I ignored her while I recovered from the shock of that awkward and scandalous entrance. I automatically picked up my phone to look at the time.

  “Seven-fifteen! Holy...!” I thought, gritting my teeth. I was forced to agree with my father—what an hour to get up, or rather, give a heart attack to the ill with their strident, sing-song voices.

  I took a deep breath and looked sideways at the bed. It didn’t just upset me, Joaquín also had a grimace of displeasure that he tried to disguise. That made me laugh out loud enough for the nurse to turn around to look at me. I pretended to be looking at my cell phone, but I know she had sensed that my nervous giggle had something to do with her.